I’m getting ready for a Halloween party we’re having tonight! Fun…the kids are excited! After trick-treating, we’re going to have a fire outside and make s’mores. Tell some spooky stories and make some cool memories.
This is one of many passages we read in class on Monday about Covenant Theology and God’s forgiveness… and well, I’ve never really thought about it in this way before. I was blown away. And reminded of something I was listening to just that morning by As Cities burn (i think i even posted the song here before class)… “I’m sure if you wanted it to stop love, You could just untie your end and let it go, but my God you don’t, and I think I love You for it.” … It’s like the big message in this passage is “Even though you break my heart and I am angered by your rejection of me, I LOVE YOU and how could I ever stop? I’m not human like you, I am divine and perfect. And because of that, dispite my anger and the fact that you do deserve punishment, I choose love and compassion. I choose peace.” (an important thing for me to remember as I read about death and destruction through the rest of the OT)
8 “How can I give you up, Ephraim? How can I hand you over, Israel? How can I treat you like Admah? How can I make you like Zeboiim? My heart is changed within me; all my compassion is aroused.
9 I will not carry out my fierce anger, nor will I turn and devastate Ephraim. For I am God, and not man— the Holy One among you. I will not come in wrath.
I have always pondered the “true” nature of God. Does God have the face of compassion or wrath or indifference…or is God the eternally shifting face of change? If God can so change his mind/heart from hate to love-mercy to judgement-protection to wrath just as we can…what is holiness? What separates/differentiates us from God?
interview went really well. ended up chatting for about an hour and fifteen minutes… instead of the alloted thirty minutes! and i had a good meal at Swiss - go chicken quesidillas! (sp?) And my prof totally paid for my dinner, which was unexpected.. but i think it was a pitty dinner as I totally had just poured out my heart completely about the craziness of the last six months and all my family dynamics and the pain I’ve been going through. AND- totally didn’t cry. I had my little bag of tissues sitting right there on the table and didn’t even tear up. That is such a sign of improvement. One thing, he gave me probably one of the nicest compliments.. something no one’s ever told me. he said I sound like a real ‘strong’ person. I have felt anything but strong- I felt completely helpless and weak in a way that I have never felt before… but it’s refreshing to get someone else’s perspective.
ALSO, stopped at Yorkdale on the way home, slight detour, and picked up Cardinology! woo hoo! got through it almost twice during the rest of the ride. “Born into a Light” “Cobwebs” “Crossed out name” and “stop” are definite favourites. I think the album will continue to grow on me with every listen. I think what I may do is listen to his whole discography from the beginning until now… hear the bigger picture. I always love to do that with my fave artists. Perhaps tomorrow when I kick some serious ass while studying and writing my next paper.
Such a good idea to listen in chronological order… I thank ye!
now i am back home. Back requiem kickin on my jambox and i am gonna eat some more lentil soup and maybe i dunno make more tea.
what a trip today is in general
i dunno if i feel great you know but i don’t feel like i am dying- my head is splitting
had some aspirin and that helped
i wonder what Celtic Frost are doing right now,
what if Fergie is doing a duet with Celtic Frost right now
maybe ill nap
gonna set an alarm and then do the secret electric gig
maybe tonight i will get to go buy the record
i kinda can’t wait to hear it
people seem to like it
i wonder what it sounds like mastered
they were playing sink ships at Murray’s this rad bagel shop i love yesterday
i asked them how it was playing and they said satellite radio
but i kinda thought that was how radio worked
maybe i dunno how stuff works
got to nap
then brussel sprouts and lentil soup then jams
I hope you are dozing like a babe as I write this. I can only imagine how tiring today must have been so far after your ordeal. You are showing such dedication to your chosen path.
Radio was invented before satellites were dreamed up…radio waves are beamed from towers and can only travel so far depending on the strength of the signal and the geography of the area. Only recently (within a decade) has satellite begun to be used…that way you can get radio from virtually anywhere within the satellite range. I don’t have it, but how freaking amazing is all of this shit? Like Kyte? Ray Bradbury would cream his proverbial jeans.
Mastered? You guys blend like butta.
How about Kathleen Battle and Metallica? Oh my sweetgoodness…
“Although no doubt busy releasing his new Cardinals record in stores and on jukeboxes worldwide, jotting down those infinity blues and blogging himself fuzzy, Ryan Adams has also taken time to write a piece for the World Policy Journal for MIT Press. Adams’ article, entitled “How to Save the World from Doom: Where You and It Are Headed,” is featured in the latest issue, themed 2033 —Our World in 25 Years.” (via Paste magazine)
Good Lord, just when I think I respect this guy for a gazillion reasons, I learn of yet one more! I can’t wait to read this later.
OK, I read it and had quite a good laugh…he’s something-that one.
I’m unsure about sharing this on here. Mainly because I’m not sure who actually reads this (specifically meaning, people I know in ‘real life’ vs tumblr blogosphere), and it can lead to many different assumptions about who I am, etc. Then, at the same time, I started writing on here because I wanted an outlet- a “safe” place to express myself, and be myself. I wanted to increase my authenticity, and in a way, make myself more vulnerable- so it’d be appropriate for me to just go ahead. I don’t want to hide or censor these thoughts… yet, is it alright to admit that sometimes I get nervous or scared when i post thoughts, even if they’re about something ridiculous? Well, here it goes. These are important events in my life. I’ve spent a long time thinking about it- and while there’s a lot NOT said, these key moments can speak bucketloads.
1982- Born, November 15
1995- Move from Scarborough to King City at age 12, start attending Unionville Alliance Church
1997- Commit self to Christ at Good Friday Youth Rally
Aug. 1997- Koning family starts going to Clyffe House
1998- Attend a four week Leadership In Training program @ Ontario Pioneer Camp
Jan. - June 2002- 6 month program at Capernwray Bible School in New Zealand
2002-2003- Live in Macdonald Hall dorm at the University of Guelph
Oct. 2002- Meet husband, Regan, at Pedro the Lion concert @ the Horseshoe Tavern
2003- Senior pastor is asked to resign by board of elders; a split occurs
2005- Marry Regan on Aug 14
2006- Graduate from the University of Guelph, move to Markham.
Nov. 2006- Start seeing Naturopath doctor, due to serious health concerns
Jan. 1, 2007- Aunt Lori dies
Jan. 2, 2007- Start working as Children’s Minister at Unionville Alliance Church
2007- My father and brother stop going to church. My brother renounces his faith in God to our family
Summer of 2007- Learn about state of parent’s marriage and that my father wants to leave
Sept. 2007- Regan is asked to apply for Youth Director position at Gateway Alliance
Sept. 2007- Start studying part-time at Tyndale
Oct. & Dec. 2007- My father refuses to go to family functions. This is the first time in my memory he’s ever missed one.
Jan. 2008- Attend weekly counselling sessions at Tyndale
Jan. 2008- My cousin attempts suicide a year after her mother’s death
Jan. 2008- We accept position at Gateway and purchase our first home
June 2008- We resign from Unionville and move to Caledonia
Sept. 2008- Start studying full-time
Well, I began to read your blog a bit ago-drawn to your energy by how you had responded to Fuzzy/Foggy. I am thankful for your honesty and happy for your progress in this human experience. I also totally understand about wanting to include music on your timeline. I definitely have a soundtrack to my memories…all of the important ones anyway.
eatin salad reading sunday times. i am in the fucking arts and leisure section. i can’t believe they printed a picture of Xasthur. f’yeah!! weird to be in the times. olsen twins are in the times. maybe i need to get a twin (as in duplicate myself, so that one of me can stay in and read forever and one can bustass) nah. wha?
omfgnyft indeed! I’m so proud of you- you little beaner. That is really the shit-that certainly ought to pump you up! That was a nice article-your musical descriptions were quite eloquent.
PS: how can you eat salad in the middle of the night? ewww